A Journey of Unlearning & Realignment 

My second life didn’t begin until I started unlearning the one I was surviving in. When I began to see the first half of my life as my greatest teacher, I finally stepped into my power.

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I had spent years chasing performance. It was the only way I knew how to belong or feel valuable. I prided myself on self-sufficiency, never asking for help, always bending over backward for others.

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That value always came from the outside. Straight As, trophies, and external validation defined my worth. I became a chameleon, adapting to others’ expectations, an excellent performer but completely drained inside.

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Alcohol became my relief and my career. It slowed my overactive mind and made me feel connected to other people - something I had struggled with my whole life. It was my reward, my escape, and my rebellion. But beneath it all, I was barely surviving.

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For over ten years, I built my professional life in the alcohol industry, surrounded by the very thing that was keeping me stuck. From the outside, I was thriving. Inside, I was unraveling.

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Until one day, I decided I’d had enough. Even if it meant dismantling the life I’d meticulously built, I knew I had to change. So I quit drinking on September 1, 2021.

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The Moment Everything Shifted

I thought quitting would make everything better. Instead, it made everything raw. My stress spiked. The emptiness I’d numbed for years grew louder. For so long, alcohol made me feel normal, like I finally fit in a world where I always felt different. It wasn’t just a habit; it was an identity I’d worn for fifteen years.

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Leaving it behind felt unfair, but it forced me to confront truths I’d been avoiding.

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At the same time, I felt trapped in a career that no longer aligned with who I was becoming, even though on paper I was thriving. I had spent more than a decade working in an industry that once felt exciting but now felt completely disconnected from who I was becoming. I had outgrown my old life, but I didn’t yet know who I was without it.

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I started pulling my energy back. I stopped performing for others. I began creating from my heart instead of from stress and ego. Without alcohol as a buffer, I could no longer tolerate the mundane BS that dominated corporate life. People noticed the change. Many didn’t like it.

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That’s when I realized quitting alcohol was just the beginning. Unlearning wasn’t just about removing substances; it was about reprogramming beliefs that had kept me small. I had spent years trying to change my reality, but nothing shifted until I changed my beliefs.

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Why Distillness Exists

Distillness is the story of my awakening: quitting drinking, unmasking my AUDHD, and walking away from a successful career in the alcohol industry to step fully into my authentic self.

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Taking responsibility for my life means standing in my truth and seeing that I was never broken. I was simply wired differently. The world needs different. I no longer fear uncertainty. I embrace it, because every step brings me closer to alignment.

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I am deeply grateful for what alcohol taught me. Now, I’m ready to share what I’ve learned.

This is my unlearning journey. 

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Join Me on the Journey

If you're on a path of unlearning and embracing your authentic self, I welcome you to join me. My goal is not perfection, but authenticity. 

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Let’s realign this world together starting with ourselves.